YY's Little O.L. Notes

Tuesday, August 26, 2003

The 2 Cows Theory



I don't know the source of this joke, but it must be written by someone who has strong prejudice against Malaysian.


TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM

You have two cows.
You sell one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies and the economy grows.
You sell them and retire on the income.


AN AMERICAN CORPORATION

You have two cows.
You sell one and force the other to produce the milk of four cows.
You are surprised when the cow drops dead.


A FRENCH CORPORATION

You have two cows.
You go on strike because you want three cows.


A JAPANESE CORPORATION

You have two cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create clever cow cartoon images called Cowkimon' and market them world-wide.


A GERMAN CORPORATION

You have two cows.
You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.


A BRITISH CORPORATION

You have two cows.
Both are mad.


AN ITALIAN CORPORATION

You have two cows, but you don't know where they are.
You break for lunch.


A SWISS CORPORATION

You have 5,000 cows and none of which belong to you.
You charge others for storing them.


A CHINESE CORPORATION

You have two cows.
You have 300 people milking them.
You claim full employment and high bovine productivity.
You have the newsman who reported on the numbers arrested.


AN INDIAN CORPORATION

You have two cows.
You worship them.


A SINGAPOREAN CORPORATION

You have two cows.
One cow-peh and one cow-bu


A MALAYSIAN CORPORATION

You have two cows.
You signed a 40-year contract to supply milk at RM0.06 per litre.
Then midway through, you raised the price to RM0.60 or you cut the supply.
When the buyer agrees to the new price, you change your mind again and now want RM1.20.
The buyer decided you can keep the milk and they go look for milk that comes from recycled cows. Your two cows retire together with the Prime Minister.

Thursday, August 21, 2003

Complain complain complain...

I booked rooms at Swiss�tel The Stamford for the business trips, it turned out to be quite a disappointment. Not a bad lobby, 5-star hotel, 5-star location, .... however, a 3-star room, and a 2-star service. My room was facing the construction site, with a early 90s furnishing. I guess there's no change or improvements to the rooms for a decade even though its name has been changed recently. One of the light bulk was spoilt, and the stopper handle of the bathtub wasn't working too. I hate to wait for the lift as it takes ages to arrive. Checking in and out is a game of patient, basically it takes more than half an hour each time.

Thursday, August 14, 2003

My laptop is down. How it happens ? I bought it for only 1/2 year. The vendor can't tell what happen, he guessed there may be something wrong with the motherboard, and needed to be sent back to the original manufacturer for repair, that's in Japan. It will take about 1 month before I can get it back. In addition, the e-mail server is also down due to some virus attack I heard. So, I haven't been doing anything during working hour.

Wednesday, August 06, 2003

Overtime Grumble

It is really not desirable to work OT at my office due to the following reasons:

1. The air-condition supply terminates at 7pm sharp. You will find yourself working in ovan condition during this mid summer and oxygen is in scare supply as there's no alternative source of air supply. The condition worsen after mid-night and when someone is smoking in the enclosed office.

2. Very limited choice of dinner after 8pm.

3. A more hostile working environment than during the day time as everybody are tired and in bad mood.

4. You either:
a. You become the most hated person from your counterpart's point of view and they have to accompany you, or
b. You find yourself stuck every 5 minutes as people who can help you have left the office.

5. Anymore ? I can't think anymore, I'm going home now....